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  1. #1
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    8 out of 8 members liked this post. Yes Reputation No

    What the average idiot wants in a car...

    I work with the average idiot. He's a smart guy, but he doesn't know crap about cars. I assume he is your average person when it comes to cars. This, of course, makes him an idiot.

    He came to me quite often with car questions when his old car was breaking constantly and when it came time to buy a new one, he came to me even more often. As is typical for your average idiot, he didn't know what he wanted. He thought he wanted an Audi or a BMW. Of course, he didn't know which particular Audi or BMW he wanted, he just knew he wanted one. So I asked him what his price range was which was "in the 20-somethings." I told him if he was set on an Audi or Bimmer he should look at early 2000's M3's and S4's because they are both kickass and still look very nice. The problem was that he had his heart set on 2008 as the absolute bottom limit for the year, dont ask me why. He also said he needed four doors since him and his wife just had a baby.

    I told him maybe he should broaden his search a little bit to some different makes due to his price constraints and the fact that he wont have a big yearly budget for parts/labor/maintenance and cant even change his own oilClick here to enlarge so I didn't think a 2009 A4 with a ton of miles on it was the best car for him. I took him to a few dealerships around town hoping to convince him that an infinity or a Volkswagon Passat would be nice for him. After some time i learned a couple more things: 1) he doesn't know why he should care about FWD vs RWD vs AWD, (2) he didn't really care about how fun a car was to drive, (3) he wanted something that looked "baller" and (4) that "baller" doesn't mean nice or classy, it actually just means shiny (as in nissan maxima with big wheels and tinted windows).

    We are both lawyers so i managed to convince him to forgo some "baller" for a little bit of class. He hated the Volkswagon because it said "Volkswagon" on the front of it. Based upon all these things, I pointed him towards a 2009ish Cadillac CTS. He absolutely loved it, he loved the chrome, he loved the grill, the styling, the power (his last car had about 150hp), the ride, the interior and most of all, the flash. It was also well within his price range, in good shape, and with pretty low mileage.

    I helped him negotiate a great deal on the car and convinced him to take a weekend to think about it and maybe get the dealer to come down a bit more. On Monday he showed up with a 2.0t Volkswagon CC with more miles, one less seat than the CTS, all kinds of scuffs and other marks and minor issues with the interior and overall in worse shape than the CTS. This was fine with me because I thought a volkswagon was nice, practical choice for someone like him. I asked him why he decided to go with the VW thinking he would say something like "i got a great deal" or "it snows here (Nebraska) so I thought FWD would be better" or "it gets better mileage" or "its more reliable." Note that they were about the same price.

    Turns out he bought the CC because "It had a navigation screen" and he liked the funky key. Thats it! No other reason! I nearly crapped my pants over the navigation screen because we live in Nebraska, not LA, its not that easy to get lost here because there's not much here. He also has an iphone. After some prodding, it turns out that he just liked having the big screen on the dash because its more "baller."

    So what did I learn? I learned that the average idiot doesn't care that much about reliability (although i think he got a good car on accident in that respect, he didn't do any research), power, maintenance costs, driver involvement, handling, power, class, looks, style or much else that we (people who talk smack on message boards) care about. They really just care about the bells and whistles and showing them off. It could have been the crappiest car in the world but if it had a big screen and some esoteric lights he would have bought it.

    Its because of the average idiot that the ford mytouch system sells so well, not because it works better than a knob but because it looks cooler than a knob.

    The sad part is that these people outnumber car guys severely which means more and more cars will be made for them and less and less cars will be made for us. For every elise purchased there will be 30,000 PT Cruisers purchased.

    Rant over Click here to enlarge
    Last edited by fieldysnuts8; 03-06-2012 at 01:33 AM.

  2. #2
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    Wow...my faith in the human race just dropped a notch. I mean...I know many people like this, but your description removes any doubt it was just the way i was seeing it. Can't understand people like that. I can't act like that about anything. I always research big purchases and the more you learn the more you find out that the standard "experts" in stores and whatnot don't know $#@! about whatever it is and the average joe buys completely horrible example of said item. (i.e. cars, computers, power tools, welders, guns, etc.) Amazing.
    Never thought I would see the day...
    Click here to enlarge Originally Posted by Terry@BMS Click here to enlarge
    Life is so much more fun with a nemesis. I miss Shiv. Click here to enlarge
    Click here to enlarge

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    When the hell did you become a lawyer?

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    OP's post sounds about right. My friend picked up a clean '04 E46 M3 from a guy. Had really low miles. He asked him if it was SMG or 6MT to which the guy responded, "Well its automatic but you can do manual too. I just let it drive itself." Click here to enlarge

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    wth... i hope i can buy an m3 from a guy such as that. But ot, im finding more and more people who call themselves car guys who are just like that.
    Click here to enlarge

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    well said, repped for truth... Unfortunately.
    Some people live long, meaningful lives.

    Other people eat shit and die.

    I'm not racist, I hate everybody equally; especially fat people.


    Click here to enlarge

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    Hate these kind of people. They're dumbasses.
    Burger Motorsports
    Home of the Worlds fastest N20s, N54s, N55s, S55s, N63s, and S63s!

    It is the sole responsibility of the purchaser and installer of any BMS part to employ the correct installation techniques required to ensure the proper operation of BMS parts, and BMS disclaims any and all liability for any part failure due to improper installation or use. It is the sole responsibility of the customer to verify that the use of their vehicle and items purchased comply with federal, state and local regulations. BMS claims no legal federal, state or local certification concerning pollution controlled motor vehicles or mandated emissions requirements. BMS products labeled for use only in competition racing vehicles may only be used on competition racing vehicles operated exclusively on a closed course in conjunction with a sanctioned racing event, in accordance with all federal and state laws, and may never be operated on public roads/highways. Please click here for more information on legal requirements related to use of BMS parts.

  8. #8
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    Click here to enlarge Originally Posted by Sticky Click here to enlarge
    When the hell did you become a lawyer?
    Graduated law school last may and got admitted to the bar last September broseph.

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    1 out of 1 members liked this post. Yes Reputation No
    Good read! Would rep if I could.

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    Addition to the rant: what really chaps my bag is what people brag about in cars now. I have always cared a lot more about horsepower and 0-60 than I cared about touch screens and key fobs. It seems like I'm a dying breed though.

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    Goes to show most people who claim to want a "car guys" opinion don't give a sh!% what we have to say. Their just looking to check the box that says they've talk to one of us.

    OTOH, what a great personal case study in negotiation for you, that the counter party in your discussion misled you the whole way. This used to happen to me in auto and real estate transaction negotiations all the time!

  12. #12
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    The annoying thing is that its not like we were actually counter parties, I was just trying to help him as requested. No need to lie to someone who is helping you.

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    That sir is just how it is... I completely agree with you. Guess what??? 90% of BMW purchasers are the same. Click here to enlarge

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    My brother is slightly like that but not as bad. He has a 2008 IS350 fully loaded that thinks it's the greatest thing in the world. Just to piss him off I call it a Camry, it really drives him nuts lol. One day I got into a discussion where he was telling me how his car is better than mine, here are his reasonings:

    1. He has vented seats, I don't
    2. He has navigation, I don't
    3. He has a backup camera, I don't

    So to sum it up he decided to discontinue the conversation as those 3 things made his car much better than mine. One day he took me for a ride and since he's a cop he drives like a maniac everywhere, he floored the living piss out of his car and I'm just thinking, "is something going to happen soon?" Got out of the car completely unimpressed and didn't really say anything cause if I did I would've just gotten into an argument with him, one that I would never give up on because how convinced I now was that his Toyola sucks total ass.

    A few weeks later we go pick up our parents from the airport and decide to take my car, he was a bit mad cause we couldn't drive fast anymore since he wasn't driving. I told him you're in the car that's enough. I didn't drive fast at all, did a few 6th gear pulls to get up to 100mph on a few open stretches of road. This is what followed:

    1. Wow this thing rides really nice!!!
    2. What did you do to make this thing that much faster than my car, holy crap!!! (JB4 Map 1, ETS Intercooler, Quaife LSD)

    I win this sibling war!
    Click here to enlarge

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    lol, I laugh at people like that. There is just no way of getting thru those thick ass skulls........

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    Click here to enlarge Originally Posted by fieldysnuts8 Click here to enlarge
    Graduated law school last may and got admitted to the bar last September broseph.
    I can't believe this. How you became a lawyer before me is mind boggling.

    What was your LSAT?

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    Click here to enlarge Originally Posted by fieldysnuts8 Click here to enlarge
    Addition to the rant: what really chaps my bag is what people brag about in cars now. I have always cared a lot more about horsepower and 0-60 than I cared about touch screens and key fobs. It seems like I'm a dying breed though.
    Not on this website.

  18. #18
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    Click here to enlarge Originally Posted by fieldysnuts8 Click here to enlarge
    The annoying thing is that its not like we were actually counter parties, I was just trying to help him as requested. No need to lie to someone who is helping you.
    Isn't the real issue though that he is an attorney and couldn't even afford the brand he wanted to pose with?

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    He's drowning in student loans and lives beyond his means elsewhere. Don't get your hopes too high on attorney salaries. The median wage nation wide is probably in the 40-50k range right out of law school. The market sucks for attorneys right now, too much supply and not enough demand. Unless you are at a big time firm working 70 hrs a week its a pretty average job.

    Its been a few years but I think I got a 154 or 158 or somewhere around there on the lsat. I'm sure you'll dominate it.

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    Click here to enlarge Originally Posted by leo985i Click here to enlarge
    lol, I laugh at people like that. There is just no way of getting thru those thick ass skulls........
    I've always wondered who decided Lexus were nice. They are underwhelming and boring compared to their competition on all fronts.

  21. #21
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    Click here to enlarge Originally Posted by fieldysnuts8 Click here to enlarge
    He's drowning in student loans and lives beyond his means elsewhere. Don't get your hopes too high on attorney salaries. The median wage nation wide is probably in the 40-50k range right out of law school. The market sucks for attorneys right now, too much supply and not enough demand. Unless you are at a big time firm working 70 hrs a week its a pretty average job.

    Its been a few years but I think I got a 154 or 158 or somewhere around there on the lsat. I'm sure you'll dominate it.
    Not doing it to make money as an attorney.

    Click here to enlarge Originally Posted by fieldysnuts8 Click here to enlarge
    Its been a few years but I think I got a 154 or 158 or somewhere around there on the lsat. I'm sure you'll dominate it.
    I did Click here to enlarge

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    Click here to enlarge Originally Posted by Sticky Click here to enlarge
    Not doing it to make money as an attorney.



    I did Click here to enlarge
    I didn't forget about what went down at the academic decathelon back in the day. Are you in law school now? Would this convo be better handled via pm so we don't hijack it worse than we already have?

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    Click here to enlarge Originally Posted by fieldysnuts8 Click here to enlarge
    I didn't forget about what went down at the academic decathelon back in the day. Are you in law school now? Would this convo be better handled via pm so we don't hijack it worse than we already have?
    That was some amazing work if I do say so myself.

    Sure, pm'ing is better.

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    Click here to enlarge Originally Posted by fieldysnuts8 Click here to enlarge
    I didn't forget about what went down at the academic decathelon back in the day. Are you in law school now? Would this convo be better handled via pm so we don't hijack it worse than we already have?
    LOL at academic decathlon! I won the interview category for that back in the day! I commend you Lsat folks though, I'm all about the MCAT

    PS actually on topic, my friends that have the IS350 argue the same points haha, but its too tame of a car. Also i'd make fun of him by calling it a corolla, the camrys equivalent would be the ES350 haha!

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    Click here to enlarge Originally Posted by wtfmateim65 Click here to enlarge
    LOL at academic decathlon! I won the interview category for that back in the day! I commend you Lsat folks though, I'm all about the MCAT

    PS actually on topic, my friends that have the IS350 argue the same points haha, but its too tame of a car. Also i'd make fun of him by calling it a corolla, the camrys equivalent would be the ES350 haha!
    The sad part is that the is350 is probably the best consumer car Lexus makes right now.

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